A Spiritual Experience.

A Spiritual Experience.
Step XII: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.


Yesterday my boss was riding me hard and I just wanted to tell her and
The whole world to F off...
Lynne had to work late and because of other people running errands I
Didn’t have a ride home til she could pick me up off the train at 8pm
So I stayed in town...
Walked around a few historical sites...graveyard that has Paul Revere,
Ben Franklin’s parents. Hancock. Few politicians and big wigs...like
One of the judges from the Salem witch trials...cool place and things
To do...
Then walked over to an AA meeting that I just love...and one of my AA
Friends in Atlanta text me about to relapse...my phones dying but
Finally got in touch and kept her in good spirits...
Well now I had missed half the meeting and im in the lobby way...
Glass wall behind me overlooking the cemetery that I just told you
About... beautiful fall view... and there’s a man there... sitting in
One of 3 chairs off behind the coffee table...looks lost. Just deep
In thought.
So I sit down and start talking... can smell him...but whatever. Its
AA this is my favorite "city" meeting because it’s across the street
From Boston common where homeless and down and out sleep on park
Benches...within eyesight of the Massachusetts State house up the
Street...
Across the street from the cemetery is Suffolk univ. law school and
There is just a strange assortment of people that attend...
Big wigs, college students, business men in suits... people in jogging
Outfits that ran in the park... homeless... saw a gay couple of men
Wheeling in their daughter... just all types.

So I start talking to this downtrodden man...about life, love,
Money, spirituality... getting by. The nature of men and how easy it is
To judge and discount people.
He was amazingly smart...struggling at life but wise ... had been
Coming to meetings for 37 years..
And yet had struggled to stay away from the bottle in the past 2
Months. He wouldn’t get into great detail about certain things and I
Respected that. I didn’t pry...just wanted to help if I could...
But the reality is I wouldn’t have been able to change his
Reality...all I could ever do is lift his spirits and give him a
Different perspective on what he had been going through recently.
He changed my mind...about how I was feeling about my own life...about
Perseverance about god about faith and about humanity.... in the
Matter of an hour he had that much power inside him.
God works through people...through conversations and moments in our
Lives...where had we taken a left instead of a right...etc...
I think of this often lately. Having started to reconnect with people
In my past, losing touch with friends...feeling a need to reconnect
With my family...etc.

He just had a lot of wisdom, caring and just a gentle soul.

He told me about going to the bank and realizing that he smelled from 6 days of no showers. Girl possibly kicked him out from what I gathered but not completely out living on streets from the look of things. He insisted he had a place to stay. He goes to work for a newspaper company and had 40 cents left after buying his Charlie Train card...food, Etc
he had just put his pea coat in the dry cleaners so that he could go on a job interview Monday. With what little he had.
He was embarrassed because it was dirty and smelly and the lady had to ring it out and just looked at him. He goes people judge they can be so cruel... we talked about how people when they bundle up in winter they bundle up emotionally too…
We become cold and distant…
He had just taken a trip by train out west to San Diego and San Francisco and Texas for some work he had to do he insisted.
The man was sharp minded, sensitive, prideful and compassionate. Gentle in spirit and demeanor.

I told him did the jacket keep ya warm? ya... did it do what its designed to do? ya... then SO WHAT! Why you worried about what she thinks. Her job is to be of service and clean it up for you.
so you can look good and carry yourself well and keep your chin up for this interview...
he was telling me about talking to a young guy that wasn’t in AA about spiritual stuff and god and how he "didn’t get it"
and I said that’s why you got to come here... be around people that understand you...
and he had been coming for 37 years...struggling drinking again for the last 2 months it seems ... and wow just a great man.
There is alot of possibilities in life and I need to stop and see them
As positives. Anyway... im rambling but im in a much better mood after a very long
And trying week
Hard to really describe but the kind of guy you would walk past on the street...well most would... you might not :)

The reality is I could have walked by this man and never seen him again. Now I hope to see him again next Thursday. I insisted I would try my best to be there for him. That’s all I can really give most anyone… my time and attention. I can’t change his life I can’t take away the pain he seemed to be in…but for a moment he smiled…and even though his teeth were dingy it was the prettiest smile I have seen in years…because it was pure joy. Someone had shown me dignity and taken the time to talk to me and me with him. The generation gap between us had left.
I may never see him again. I might see him Thursday. Doesn’t really matter only that I let the spirit of the moment settle in and change me for the better.